Two Thumbs Up

I am a rater. If you ask my husband, he would tell you that I am heartless and cruel in my rants of things that I detest and that I am a gusher about things that I adore. I rate everything. My children's behavior on any given day. How my sleep was last night. If I thought the cashier was friendly at the grocery store. The play list on the radio. How supper turned out. The sermon at church. How clean the bathroom was at the gas station. How comfortable my shoes are. Who's the smartest, most talented, most gorgeous? How my hair looks. How other people's hair looks. How the garden is growing. How people drive. How people talk. How people walk. And so on and so forth, ad nauseum. This is my self-imposed exhaustion. Why have I taken it upon myself to determine and comment on EVERYTHING? Who cares that I think about the weather, or that outfit, or that book? Is it really what I think anyway?

I have been taught to rate by watching American Idol. I am prompted to rate other people's comments on facebook with the little word "like" that I can click on with my mouse. I can rate this very blog by adding how many stars I think it deserves. I almost can't help myself...it's so fun to share my opinion with the world! How much is my opinion of things based on what I really love or what I have been trained to believe about things. Here's the scenario... standards of what is acceptable and excellent have already been set by the world that we live in. If I watch TV, read a magazine, look at advertisements, flip through a newspaper or listen to the radio I have a picture of what my relationships should be like, what I should wear, what I should buy, what I should read, what I should listen to, what activities I should do, who I should vote for, what my bank account should look like, where I should travel and what I should eat. Is any of this really coming from people who give a rip about who I am? Why do whoever "they" are want me to become a robot clone? Doing, thinking, and acting how they propose as the most beneficial? For whom?

I have decided that all this evaluating is robbing me of the enjoyment of the little things and has isolated me from truly understanding other people's perspectives. Rating has taken away my ability to achieve or underachieve at my leisure. It has stolen my freedom to create something that others may think sucks, but means something to me. It has hindered me from seeing past the exterior to see what really matters; character. It has stolen my courage to try things and fail miserably.

I give breaking this habit of rating things two thumbs up.