Dear People of the World, (whom I have neglected to phone)
Does anyone out there hate phoning people as much as I do? As of today, I have a list of about five people that I have to phone for a meeting and I have been rehearsing in my mind what I'm going to say. So, I put it off and get more tense (I'm hoping that writing about my fear may give me courage). Just to be clear I don't dislike the people that I have to phone, I dislike the actual physical act of phoning. The phoning didn't start off well this evening either. Of course, I phoned the wrong number. (That seems to be the way it goes with me.) Am I the only idiot out there that feels like I get tongue tied and nervous before I even start dialing? If I could write people short notes and have them hand delivered by my own personal servant, I would do much better. I think I may have been born in the wrong century. Writing seems to be so natural to me, while talking about the details of things in a coherent and concise manner seems to escape my capabilities. Some of you out there may have noticed....I must say that I'm not sure I can be a grown-up about this.
Over the years Jeremy has tried to help me get over my fear of phoning people, by getting me to do some of his phoning. He has been very encouraging, but to no avail. It still is not something that I anticipate with any measure of excitement. Phone in hand, I always feel that my words come out wrong or I forget to say something that I was supposed to and have to phone all over again. Ah, the vicious cycle. I feel sometimes as though the "real" Lisa has been hand cuffed and my arch nemesis has ripped the phone from my hands. It's really too bad that my arch nemesis is also myself.
I'm not sure if there is reformation for my problem on the horizon. I don't know if I can be fixed or if my phone phobia will ever cease to be an anxiety to me, so until then, I'll call when you're out and leave a message on your voice mail.
P.S. I really do like you and if I have ever phoned you and you have been completely stupefied by something I've said, I apologize.